Diary of a Social Butterfly

So Mulloo’s sneaked back. From Isloo, baba, where else? She’d gone there for Imran’s dharna. When she left she told us that she wasn’t coming back till she’d toppled this guvmunt and taken Nawaz’s resign in her own hand. ‘At least Imran’s honest’, she said before election. To which Janoo had said, ‘So is Kulchoo. Let’s make him PM.’ From then on we were ‘dollar khor Indian agents and Amreeka kay naukars’. But when Imran didn’t become PM, she began to say: ‘Jitna kaam Sharifs ne Lahore mein kya hai …’ etc., but when Tony didn’t get his lones written off she said: ‘Iss corrupt guvmunt se insaan kya expect kar sakta hai?’ and went back to being a Khanista.

So she, Flopsy and Fluffy – all dye hard Khanistas – had gone to Isloo to bring revolution. Sunny went with them because her trip to Bangcock got cancelled. So it was Sunny who told everything. Mulloo tau is still pretending that she’s besieging PM house, while in fact she’s lying in her Lahore bedroom with her maid pressing her tired swollen legs.

Apparently first week sub nay enjoy kiya. They all checked into Serena and din mein had coffee and lunch vaghera and in the evenings they’d change and go for the dharna. Vahan they sand and danced with Imran and felt so proud of his stamina. Just like Gandhi. The crowd wasn’t that big unfortunately, par chalo, they had spirits…

But after a week it started becoming bore and stinky. Unfortunately, a lot of poors had come na and obviously they weren’t staying at Serena, so they were eating, sleeping and doing bathroom everywhere. Last draw came when Mulloo’s car was stopped at checkpoint manned by PTI poors carrying laathis who demanded fife thou. Mulloo said, ‘hum Imranistas hain’, but they raised their dandas and said, ‘oyyyyy, paisay nikalo’. And Mulloo quickly paid up and fled back to Lahore. But apparently Mulloo swears that the goons who stopped them were Maulvi Canada’s men who as everyone knows is ‘dollar khor Indian agent and Amreeka ka naukar.’