I said to him, ‘Nawaz is your chacha who’s come back from Hajj that you are going to receive him? And what is Maryam of yours, haan? Your cousin sister?’
He said: ‘I’m going to the airport to support democracy.’
‘Democracy is coming on a flight?’ I asked. ‘From where?’
‘Democracy is in flight,’ he said. ‘It’s being chased out even as we speak.’
‘Who is chasing it?’ ‘The Spooks,’ he said. ‘As always, they are busy dismantling it.’
But I think so the person who’s getting dismentaled is Janoo. It’s this heat, na. Kulchoo told me that Global Warning was melting geysers and ice taps in mountains like the Himalayas and the Apps but I think so it has melted poor Janoo’s brain. He was a pukka supporter of Benazir. Dye hard. Now look at him.
So I said to Janoo: ‘Tell me sachi, sachi, have you become
Nawaz Sharif’s lover?’
He laughed, ‘No, I am not Nawaz Sharif’s lover.’
Tau then?
He said that when it was Benazir v Nawaz he voted for Benazir because Nawaz was their puppet. Now when it is Imran v Nawaz and Imran is their puppet, he is with Nawaz. But Mulloo says that not only the delectables who’ve left PMLN and frocked to Imran, but she, her husband, her husband’s three brothers, they are all mashallah Imran’s lovers. She says Imran doesn’t need to fight the election even. He’s already won. Janoo says what she is saying is bilkull theek. It’s already been decided. Imran will be the next PM. Whatever the real result of the election.
So I said to Mulloo, ‘Hai Mulloo if PP (Pinky Pirni, yaar) becomes First Lady will we all have to dress like her? For a second her colour went fak at the thought. Then she recovered and said, ‘Not if, when. And she’s Bushra Bibi to you.’