Nuggets from the Urdu press

These nuggets are culled from the Urdu press. They are summarised here without comment. Absurd or ridiculous, tft takes no responsibility for them.

Nuggets from the Urdu press

On sacred animals


According to Daily Dunya (30 July 2018) Chandra Kumar Bose, the grandnephew of Netaji Subhas Chandra Bose and BJP leader in West Bengal, recommended that Hindus should not eat meat since Mahatma Gandhi ascribed maternal qualities to that animal. He further stated that those who wanted to attack people for eating meat ought not to drink the milk either.


Early start?


Daily Dunya (30 July 2018) reported that Kot Radha Kishan police had been unable to stop snooker clubs from becoming gambling dens, where young people including children were busy betting thousands of rupees on their games.


Mission accomplished


It was reported by Daily Dunya (30 July 2018) that Jahangir Tareen had said that he would resign from politics, since his mission had been to see Imran Khan as Prime Minister. He further stated that he was now willing to sit at home, if the court upheld its verdict of disqualifying him from holding office.


Taking the high road


Mustafa Kamal of the PSP was quoted by Daily Jang (30 July 2018) as saying that PTI had made gains in Karachi due to the sacrifices of his party. Kamal further stated that as far as he was concerned, the PSP had lost nothing (kuch nahin gya), and that it accepted what was acceptable to God.


Boisterousness?


It was reported by Daily Jang (30 July 2018) that a newly elected MPA of the PTI from Lahore, upon being asked by police to put a stop to aerial firing from his compound (dera), allegedly responded angrily. The police state that he and his companions attacked officers and for this reason, cases have been registered against them.


Ambitions


According to Daily Dunya (31 July 2018), when Sheikh Rasheed went to meet with Imran Khan, the latter told all those present that their new Minister for Railways had arrived. At this, Sheikh Rasheed said nothing, but later during a one-to-one conversation with Imran Khan, he asked the PTI leader for the Ministry of the Interior. Khan responded that his party’s core committee would have to deliberate upon such a matter.


Democracy and its soul


Siraj-ul-Haq of the Jamaat-e-Islami, according to Daily Jang (31 July 2018), took the view that even though an attempt had been made to put a thumb on the neck of democracy and take out its soul (jamhooriat ki garden per angootha rakh kar iski rooh nikaalnay ki koshish ki gaii), the new government should still be given a chance to operate.


Keeping his cards close


Rana Sanaullah, according to Daily Jang (31 July 2018), claimed that the PML-N had completed its number game, but that it was keeping the details secret to prevent the extra-terrestrial lifeforms (khalai makhluq) from finding out. He further claimed that Chaudhry Nisar had been prevailed upon to vote in favour of the PML-N in the Punjab Assembly. A spokesperson for Chaudhry Nisar rejected this claim.


Ooops?


Daily Nawa-i-Waqt (02 August 2018) reported that Pervez Khattak had tendered a written response to the Election Commission for the unacceptable language that he used for political opponents and women while on the campaign trail. According to Khattak’s written response, he apologized unconditionally for his language, and described it as involuntary (ghair-ikhtiyari).


Error


It was reported by Daily Express (04 August 2018) that the PTI gained one more seat officially after the Election Commission corrected a mistake, whereby one seat of the Pakistan Tehreek-e-Insaf (Movement for Justice) had been erroneously counted as having been won by the Pakistan Tehreek-e-Insaniat (Movement for Humanity). Now, the Tehreek-e-Insaniat has no seats.


Friendly advice


Daily Express (05 August 2018) quoted Asad Umar as saying to the US government to stop worrying about Pakistan, and instead focus on its own loans from China. This was described as a friendly suggestion (dostana mashwara).