Diary of a Social Butterfly

Uff! Feeling so bad, so bad for Indians right now kay don’t even ask. Such long long cues outside hospitals of people crying, begging for oxygen. Young people, same age as my Kulchoo, dying by the roadside and all those dead bodies in fires everywhere. Taubah. It’s like a scene from a nightmare. I was trying to think why India’s suffering has upset me more than America’s or Brazeel’s and I think so it is because whatever we might do to each other, we are still humsayas. Same people, same jeans. What’s happening to them today could be our fate tomorrow. Also we watch the same movies, eat the same gol guppas, give the same gaalis, and speak same to same.

Vaisay one thing I’m not understanding. Everyone said Modi is such an econmic  blizzard and he’s going to make India a Hindu Swizzerland. But just look! Econmic blizzard my shoe! Even that crack maha troll Kangana RunOut has at last shut up singing his praises. I swear if I’d been his employer when he was a chai wallah I’d have kicked him out on first day only. Just like I’d kick out our own useless guvmunt! Have you seen the latest cheeni scandal? Janoo is aag bagola.

But thanks God not everone is suffering. My Indian friend Menakshi who has that big flat on the backside of Harrods, she arrived in London just hours before it got put on red list. Menakashi’s very rich but poor thing she doesn’t have her own private jet (itna mein uss kay liye feel karti hoon na) but luckily her friend’s husband is a billionaire and he’s a huge supporter of Modi and got lots of contracts from him out of which they made gazillions and they have their own private jet and that friend khaowed pity on poor Menakshi and gave her a ride. Also eight of their best friends they also all flew out that same night in their own private jets with their families – all of them die heart BJP wallahs – and now mashallah say they’re all living it up in their London mentions in Nightsbridge and Mayfear. Jiss ko Allah rakhay…