You will be glad to know, meray aziz humwatno, that I called Ahsan Iqbal and said shabaash. I also instructed him to sack DG Rangers W.E.F. Oct 2, which he did immediately. Then I called the country’s senior-most khakis and told them exactly what I thought of them. I said I want to answer my own question: “Mujhe kyun nikala?” Then I proceeded to tell them exactly why they had nikaloed me. I instructed Shbaz Saab to print “Mujhe kyun nikala” on the backs of all Punjab Police uniforms.
I called up Modi Saab and told him, “Aaj dekha pehli baar, judges ki aankhon mein pyar. Ab ki baar, Modi sarkar”. Modi Saab responded, “Bohat daler, bohat daler. Tera mera Sher Sher”. I gave another pyar ka paigham, “Mera chaen, mera qarrar. Ab ki baar, Modi sarkar”. Modi Saab returned compliment, “Saray dushman ho gaye dher. Sher, sher, sher, sher”.
Then I had Nargisi koftay (sadly, without Nargis in them), pulao, paalak gosht, tandoori paratha and ras malai. I listened to Mukesh’s best song.
“Yeh mera diwanapan hai, ya mohabbat ka suroor.
Tu na pehchanay to hai yeh, teri nazron ka qusoor.”
This was picturised on Dilip Saab in fillum Yahudi with Meena Kumari – I decided to reproduce fillum, starring me in lead.
It was now time for some serious work, so I put on my cricketing whites and took best bat and ball and headed for Lahore’s Gaddafi Stadium. There Sher XI played Imran XI, with me as captain and opening batsman. Imran was bowler. I hit him for a six fust ball. I hit him for a six second ball. I hit him for a six thud ball. And on and on until I scored 72 runs in fust two overs.
After all this great exercise, I went home and pulled out all the voodoo dolls in my cabinet. I stuck pins into Chory Nisar, Sheikh Rasheed, Asif Zardari, several dolls in white wigs and several dolls dressed in khaki.
Then, suddenly, I woke up.
NS
I called up Modi Saab and told him, “Aaj dekha pehli baar, judges ki aankhon mein pyar. Ab ki baar, Modi sarkar”. Modi Saab responded, “Bohat daler, bohat daler. Tera mera Sher Sher”. I gave another pyar ka paigham, “Mera chaen, mera qarrar. Ab ki baar, Modi sarkar”. Modi Saab returned compliment, “Saray dushman ho gaye dher. Sher, sher, sher, sher”.
Then I had Nargisi koftay (sadly, without Nargis in them), pulao, paalak gosht, tandoori paratha and ras malai. I listened to Mukesh’s best song.
“Yeh mera diwanapan hai, ya mohabbat ka suroor.
Tu na pehchanay to hai yeh, teri nazron ka qusoor.”
This was picturised on Dilip Saab in fillum Yahudi with Meena Kumari – I decided to reproduce fillum, starring me in lead.
It was now time for some serious work, so I put on my cricketing whites and took best bat and ball and headed for Lahore’s Gaddafi Stadium. There Sher XI played Imran XI, with me as captain and opening batsman. Imran was bowler. I hit him for a six fust ball. I hit him for a six second ball. I hit him for a six thud ball. And on and on until I scored 72 runs in fust two overs.
After all this great exercise, I went home and pulled out all the voodoo dolls in my cabinet. I stuck pins into Chory Nisar, Sheikh Rasheed, Asif Zardari, several dolls in white wigs and several dolls dressed in khaki.
Then, suddenly, I woke up.
NS