Such Gup

Such Gup

Hush money


Recently, an important official with a significant post close to Takht Lahore, began a titillating telephone romance with a young woman. The romance grew and grew until the woman persuaded the gent to rendezvous with her at a discreet location. The gent went eagerly to the appointed destination, only to find that the lady had had a change of heart. She wanted to end the teleromance and demanded Rs 2 lakhs as hush money. The disappointed gent made over the money and beat a hasty retreat. We hear he later got a relative to file an FIR against the woman, claiming he’d been robbed.

Roasting sacred cows?


Our mole in the corridors of power tells us that some sort of cleansing is underway in that holy of holies. Rumour has it that the head honcho of the Invisible Soldiers Inc. has removed two Bs and one C from their posts and is conducting an enquiry against them for corruption. Cynics say the sun will rise in the West the day that happens – we’re not going to be roasting sacred cows anytime soon.

Wall chalkings


Your average citizen is well-informed and intelligent, and if proof were needed that he also has a sense of humour, it’s right here in these wall chalkings across Pakistan:

1.    “Roti, bijli, gas na pani,

Dil hai phhir bhi Pakistani”

2.   “Pakistan ka matlab kya?

Haseena Beauty Parlour”

3.   “Iss baar vote kissi insaan kay bachay ko dena,

Kuttay ya sher ko naheen”

4.   “Rozaydaar! Iftar ko iftar samjho,

Valima naheen!”