Progress rolled back every evening?
Sindh’s new Governor Muhammad Zubair was quoted by Daily Jang (06 Feb 2017) as saying that every day from 7 am in the morning to 7 pm in the evening, Pakistan progresses forward, but from 7 pm until 11 pm nothing good is depicted in the country.
Ameer Muqam’s assessment
According to Daily Jang (06 Feb 2017), Ameer Muqam was quoted as saying that Chief Minister of Khyber-Pakhtunkhwa Pervez Khattak was number 1 only in dance, while in actual performance he was ‘zero’.
Creative cops
Daily Dunya (08 Feb 2017) stated that Pakistani police were known for devising novel and unique punishments for suspects and detainees, but that now police in Wyoming, Minnesota (USA) had also come up with an innovative way to deter drunk drivers. The police department in Wyoming warned that people caught driving drunk would be made to watch Justin Bieber’s dance videos on the way to jail.
Rana Sanaullah’s recommendations for partying
According to Daily Dunya (08 Feb 2017), Rana Sanaullah stated that Basant celebrations cannot be permitted in Punjab. He suggested that people eat food and celebrate in some other way, and that even PTI rallies can be permitted, but not kite flying, which leads to throats being cut.
Classy Indians on Twitter?
Daily Dunya (08 Feb 2017) reported that when Pakistani cricket star Shahid Afridi tweeted about Kashmir Day, Indians removed the mask of secularism (secularism ka niqab utaar phenka) and began to hurl abuse at him. A man named Ganesh reportedly told Afridi that Pakistanis couldn’t beat India in a World Cup match, and yet spoke about Kashmir.
Pat on the back for Little Brother…
Visiting the Bhakki power project, Prime Minister Nawaz Sharif appeared visibly pleased. According to Daily Dunya (09 Feb 2017), when the Prime Minister praised the efforts of Chief Minister Punjab Shahbaz Sharif, the latter lowered his head.
Tempers
According to Daily Dunya (10 Feb 2017), when a traffic Warden in the Gulberg area tried to fine actress Farah Sajjad and her husband, a dispute turned physical, after which the Warden initiated legal action against the husband and the driver. Both sides accuse each other of having started it.
Master spy
Daily Dunya (10 Feb 2017) reported that a pigeon held by police in Indian Punjab for spying, Janbaz Khan, fled captivity after a Head Constable opened his cage. Janbaz Khan reportedly flew towards Pakistan, and Indian authorities reportedly declared an alert.
My Big Fat Pakistani Wedding
According to Daily Express (11 Feb 2017), when Lahore police tried to halt a wedding celebration which had crossed the 10 pm limit, male guests clashed with the officials. As the wedding turned into a battlefield, women joined the fray, and the police had to call in reinforcements. Four people were reported to have been arrested.
Failed…at killing rats?
Daily Express (11 Feb 2017) quoted senior PML-N leaders as saying that Imran Khan had not succeeded even at killing rats in Khyber-Pakhtunkhwa, so how could he speak of change (tabdeeli) in that province?