Banter in Baltistan

We hear Billy The Kid is putting up gamely with the challenges of living off grid in Gilgit-Baltistan while he campaigns for the forthcoming elections. He travels to various corners of the region on precariously rough roads and puts up at places where there is no heating – this is of course the real Pakistan, and no one, least of all political leaders, ought to be strangers to reality. But it is to Bill’s credit, used to comfort as he is, that he does not complain.

Our mole overheard him bantering with a colleague over a meal in some remote place. Bill’s colleague is vegetarian and there was not much to be had in the way of vegan fare where they happened to be. Just as his colleague was reaching for the daal, Bill jokingly said, “be careful, it’s cooked with Yak meat”. The colleague then reached for the spinach, and Bill riposted, “saag-yak gosht!”

Gang of Five

The original Gang of Four was a political faction composed of four Chinese Communist Party officials. This phrase began to be used for them when they came to prominence during the Cultural Revolution (1966-76). The Gang’s downfall, cheered by thousands on the streets of Beijing, came shortly after Chairman Mao’s death in 1976. They were labeled “counter-revolutionary forces” and charged with treason.

Isbad’s wags are saying a similar Gang of Five had sprung up in The Man of Steel’s camp, during the time he had taken a vow of silence and handed over the Party to his Talented Bro. This Gang was the Party’s “counter-revolutionary” faction, surreptitiously advancing the state’s case and signaling their disapproval of a head-on collision with the junta. We hear The Man has defanged the Gang with his outspoken narrative, and they are now all in line.

On the sidelines

The alliance partners of The Great Khan who are jockeying for power at Takht Lahore are boasting that they’ve had a “meeting of minds” with No 1. In fact, they’re saying that they’ve actually exchanged views on the sidelines of a recent wedding. This is leading to much angst in The Great Khan’s horde, especially since this “meeting” was followed by the partners’ refusal to break bread with The Khan is Isbad.