There comes a point in our lives when we realise that we’re not as young as we had been before. It’s a strange realisation, because up until this point, youth is all we’ve known. We’ve been children and teenagers and college kids, but we’ve never been adults. In my experience as a young adult in Lahore, I feel there are certain signs that signify the imminent departure of our youth.
Sign Number 1: You’re suddenly older than Justin Bieber and Kendall Jenner, and Britney Spears - who was always young but still older than you - is now a has-been who has joined the Las Vegas circuit like the ancient Celine Dion. Personally, this realisation was my introduction to aging, and has kept me up many nights ever since. When did this happen? When did I become older than some of the most successful people in the world? Sometimes I wonder if Mark Zuckerberg is younger than I am, but I’m seriously too scared to even check.
Celine Dion
Sign Number 2: You realise that most of the people you hang out or party with are much younger than you are. Now, when it comes to Saturday nights in Lahore, I usually prefer to stay in with my truncated Pakistani Netflix store. But these days, I’ve been feeling rebellious - against my newfound desire to stay at home and sleep on time. So this Saturday, I decided to attend a party with the only unmarried friend I have left (sign within a sign, people!). We weren’t expecting it, but we turned out to be the oldest people there. Everyone else was 23 and fresh out of college. If it weren’t for our well-maintained physical appearances, we would probably have been discovered for who we were: the aunties at the party.
“Beta, Madiha’s friend saw you at a wedding and she really wants to come over for tea. I hear she has a 25-year-old son, and she’s pretty wealthy.” As soon as I heard those words, I knew my day was going to be spent fighting with my mother. “Mama, he’s younger than me!” I exclaimed, clearly exasperated by the situation at hand. “Only by a few months,” she said, flicking her hair. “Anyway, I’ve been telling everyone that you’re 24.” Looking back, I probably shouldn’t have indulged in the conversation that was about to ensue. But in that moment, it was hard to walk away given the absurdity of the situation. I tried to reason with her. “Mama, what if I actually hit it off with this boy? What if we get married and go on our honeymoon and he sees my passport - which he eventually will! How am I supposed to spend the rest of my life lying to my husband about my age?” At this point, I was almost screaming, but my mother was not perturbed. She thought about what I had said for a minute, but I doubt she understood it. “I don’t think you’ll ever get to that point beta, unless you lie about your age.”
Taylor Swift
***
Now, technically I’m not old. In fact, most of my American friends seem to think we’re all actually pretty young. Like mad young. But Lahore seems to have aged my soul. Everyone here is so conscious about their age and where they stand in relation to it, and my mother has recently started referring to me as an ‘old maid’. Oh, that’s another way to tell that you’re soul is aging.
Sign Number 3: Your parents start acting out and making your life miserable because you no longer need their permission to do things. Now, this facet of aging is probably the worst. You have formed your opinions and chosen your life path, and it almost always clashes with what your parents had wanted for you. Perhaps you are dating someone your parents disapprove of, or maybe your career isn’t respectable in their opinion. Whatever it may be, you know you need to finally move out, because your home has become a battlefield of wills.
Lahore seems to have aged my soul. Everyone here is so conscious about their age
Mona Churri sat down in front of the mirror and observed her new Botox. She didn’t seem to look much younger than she did this morning, and she wondered if her left cheek was equally as plump as her right. This had been her third visit to the doctor this week, but she wasn’t happy with the results. She didn’t drink or smoke, but somehow, she looked older than her friends who did. The doctor had been slightly rude to her this morning. She had gone back to get her right cheek filled again, because she had felt that it didn’t exactly match the plumpness of her left cheek. Now, it seemed like her left needed a little boost again to match her right. She had no option. She would just have to go back and get it fixed. After all, looking young and symmetrical was very important indeed, especially with the committee lunch coming up next week…
