Diary of a Social Butterfly

Diary of a Social Butterfly
Three days before Independence Cup ka match in Lahore, me and Janoo we went to Sunny and Aki’s and we asked kay bhai who, who is coming to the match? Janoo being the OCB type that he is, he’d got tickets weeks before for me and Kulchoo and him. Thinking kay everyone is going to say ‘Us! Us!’ mein tau seedha shock mein chalee gayee when Sunny down turned her mouth like a fish and said, ‘Nobody.’

‘Haw, but why?’ I mean cricket’s come to Lahore after so long. Like a comic in the sky that streaks past I don’t know after how many centuries.

‘We asked for ten VIP passes with a little bit of proto call, you know,’ said Sunny, ‘and those spoil spots in PCB they couldn’t even do this much for us, so we thought chalo chhorrho, we’re least bothered.’

‘But you can come and sit with us in the ticketed area,’ said Janoo. ‘Seats are still available.’

‘With the era vagheras?’ sniffed Sunny. ‘Thanks but no thanks.’

Thanks God Janoo was in too much of good mood to explode there and then only.

‘It’s a shame you’re missing out on the atmosphere,’ he shrugged, ‘but your choice, I guess.’ Between you and me vaisay, I was also a little bit nervous sitting in there only. I’m not used to na. Mixing shixing with the awaam like that… As you know my brought up has been delicate. But I thought if I say even one word Janoo and Kulchoo would immediately get after me.

Anyways, the atmos was just tabahi. To tell you the truth I’m not understanding too much of cricket. When they talk of square leg, I’m reminded of Mulloo’s fat little legs encased in Lycra ki tights. And when they say falaanfalaan player is standing in a slip, I tau don’t know how they can tell because baba I can’t see what he’s wearing under his shirt and in any case unless he’s a khussra (or Tranie as Kulchoo says they’re called nowdays) he should be wearing a west and not a slip. But that aside, itna hum nay enjoy kiya na. And the awaam was very well behaved, I must say. One lady on my right even offered me a paan. Which I took. So I don’t mind mixing up with the awam, as long as it’s only once in a blue moan.