Such Gup

Such Gup

Believe it or not


Believe it or not, Billy The Kid, the late lamented Big Ben’s heir had predicted recently that “a few journos would be rounded up, possibly abducted and given a strong message”. How right he was! We also hear that when Matiullah Jan, The Brave, went missing, The Great Khan’s min for rights (such as they are in this regime) made an urgent call to her boss and revealed that Pakistan was in danger of losing its GSP Plus status, granted by the European Union. The EU’s Generalised Scheme of Preferences helps developing countries by making it easier for them to export their products to the European Union. This is done in the form of reduced tariffs for their goods. One of the main beneficiaries of this facility is Pakistan’s textile industry, the country’s largest exporter.

The GSP-Plus trading status is an instrument of the EU’s trade policy that encourages compliance with international human rights standards in return for trade incentives. A recent report by the European Commission on Human Rights has found that media freedom in Pakistan has been deteriorating since 2018, and several organisations, including the UNPO, have called on the EU not to renew GSP+ for Pakistan until it improves its human rights record.

Our mole says that’s exactly the message the Min for Rights (or the lack thereof) received immediately after Mati’s abduction. She conveyed it straight away to The Great Khan, whose right hand man then made some calls which led to Mati being freed.

On sufferance


It’s well known that The Great Khan has accepted many people into his government on sufferance, and given half a chance, he is ready to bid farewell to them. But that doesn’t mean that he should embarrass them by whittling down their authority – if he can muster the gumption, he should simply say goodbye. For we know from whence they’re coming. One such is a Brig who is a nominee of The Boyz, and has served the government despite ill health and known rebuffs. His influence has recently been curtailed once again, leading to some heart-burning.