Ittefaq Nama

Ittefaq Nama
Sometimes I feel my mind is whirling dervish. Far instance, Obama in India with band baja and not a word for Pakistan. Far instance, resign of Mohajir Qaumi Movement’s leader Altaf Hussain. In that, Altaf Hussain gave his resign to Altaf Hussain, which was rejected by Altaf Hussain after a detail discussion with Altaf Hussain in the presence of Altaf Hussain, because Altaf Hussain said resignation is no solution to problems created by Altaf Hussain. This was announced by Altaf Hussain through a long distance phone call from London to Altaf Hussain.

Far instance, resign of Punjab Governor Sarwar, who gave up British nationality to come to Pakistan. If he had been Pakistani immigrant to America, I don’t think so he would’ve come back. My information minister Praise Rasheed Saab says because Pakistanis simulate batter in America (State Department says there are 12 million illegal immigrants in US, but Native Americans say there are 300 million illegal immigrants in US). Problem with Governor Sarwar was that he belong to Labour Party which is Socialite and caring for poors etc. He was kind to Shbaz Saab and me when we were in exile in London after Musharraf’s coup. Returning the favour, I made him Governor Punjab. When he accepted, he said he wanted to help provide safe drinking water to poors. I said, no problem. Then he said he wanted to help Pak-Britons with their land qabza problems back in homeland. I said, “no problem”.

When Sarwar came here, he started doing those very things. It didn’t bother me but Shbaz Saab got upset. One day he told me in his usual frenzied, finger-wagging way: “In the old days, people who sacrificed their leisure, rest, food, sleep, enjoyment, laughter were called saints. These days they’re called Shahbaz Sharif”. Finally the penny was dropped when Shbaz Saab said Sarwar will shine through his works and laddership of Punjab will go from our hands. Scary sceniaro!

So we put so many impediments in Sarwar’s way that he finally resigned. Still my comfort eating did not stop. I think so it is because of the metal fillings in my teeth. My refrigerator magnets keep pulling me into the kitchen. That’s why I can’t loose weight.