Nuggets from the Urdu press

These nuggets are culled from the Urdu press. They are summarised here without comment. Absurd or ridiculous, tft takes no responsibility for them.

Nuggets from the Urdu press

Busted: Haseena 420

Daily Dunya (25 September 2017) reported that police arrested an 18-year-old female from Sargodha, described as “Haseena 420”. She had successfully fooled 7 young men into marrying her over the course of 4 months in order to get money out of them. In this purpose, she was assisted by men pretending to be her father, brother and even an impostor to preside over the nikaah ceremony.

Tahir-ul-Qadri on fleeing

Daily Dunya (25 September 2017) quoted Tahir-ul-Qadri as saying that Nawaz Sharif could not face accountability and jails, since his training was to loot the country and then flee.

Ghani strikes back

Commenting on the developing relations between the PTI and MQM, according to Daily Dunya (25 September 2017), the PPP’s Saeed Ghani said that the MQM had not been able to decide in four years whether it was with the government or the opposition. He further remarked that Shah Mehmood Qureshi was second to none in changing loyalties, and that the MQM had apparently cut off relations with Altaf Hussain, but that it spoke with the same tongue.

Resilient kite-fliers

Daily Jang (25 September 2017) reported that in Lahore, despite the imposition of Section 144 by the authorities, kite-fliers went about their sport uninterrupted by police.

Some good bets

According to Daily Jang (25 September 2017), PTI chief Imran Khan stated that his brother-in-law asked him for advice while betting (sattay) on cricket. With some of the winnings from Khan’s advice, the leader’s loans were paid off. Khan was quoted as asking what was wrong with any of this.

Time for Tabdeeli

Daily Dunya (26 September 2017) reported that CM Pervez Khattak removed the tehsil nazim Naushera from his post for not having produced enough people at a rally, and replaced him with his own nephew in that position.

Chandio’s assessment

The PPP’s Maula Bux Chandio was quoted by Daily Express (30 September 2017) as saying that if Imran Khan became the opposition leader, it would be the misfortune of the Parliament.

LHCBA leaders on Khwaja Asif

Daily Express (30 September 2017) quoted various leaders of the Lahore High Court Bar Association as saying that Khwaja Asif had put national security in jeopardy with his remarks in New York, and that he had not shied away from terming patriotic citizens as ‘terrorists’. They further expressed their view that the Foreign Minister had lost his mind in his love for America and India (muhabbat mein deewanay ho gae).

Another Sheikh Rasheed prediction

It was reported by Daily Express (30 September 2017) that Sheikh Rasheed predicted Nawaz Sharif’s politics will be buried (daffan) in 3 months. He further expressed his view that it was time to kick out thieves.

Self-defence in Nankana

It was reported by Daily Express (01 October 2017) that a resident of Nankana city, on his way to a village, was looted by two motorcycle-riding robbers. The robbers assaulted him for his resistance and fled the scene firing weapons in the air. The citizen chased them, however, and eventually caught up with them. He was able to apprehend one of the two robbers, who was armed with a pistol.

“Mujhe kyoon nikaala?”

Daily Express (01 October 2017) quoted Maryam Nawaz as saying that her father Nawaz Sharif was disqualified for being Nawaz Sharif.