Such Gup

Such Gup

Dripping with irony

A recent home comer to Pakistan, having plea-bargained his return with those who go around NABbing people, was constrained to sell one of the many properties he owns in the country. The situation was dripping with irony – the plea bargain of this former khaki who once presided over the bijli behemoth, was a mere Rs 200 million. The house he sold in prime Lahore, one of his many properties, was flogged for Rs 120 million. The man who bought it was a serving small-time official of the same bijli behemoth.

Brilliant gem

Here's a gem, received as a promo via email: “Dear Sir, Shangrila Resort Hotel Murree is ideally stumbled at the most conquest location in the city and from where you may plan your visit to any part of the northern region full of scenic beauty linked by road Come with your family to spend a vacation at our resort and treasure the immense God gifted beauty in your heart forever. The thrilling height, lofty peaks, magical atmosphere, sudative enjoyment are the souvenir ... Shop around and savoir. A lifetime experience to form pleasant reminiscence forever … Shangrila resorts, gracefully ornate with modern facilities:

Luxury suits, Landry & pressing, Chinese continental Pakistani dishes … Shangrila management assure you best cooperation under your kind condescension.”

Magnum opus 

Rumour has it that Chory Shuj of Guj is currently penning his magnum opus, a sort of tell all, soon to be published. Naturally, he has told it like he sees it, and there may be some score settling but the Chory is also known for observing the rules of etiquette and is famous for what in desi parlance is “vazadari”. So, we can expect his autobiography to be both civil and military, pun intended.