Such Gup

Such Gup

Remote control


Are there plans afoot to handpick and install the highest officials of the Land of the Five Rivers, to be remotely controlled from Isloo? Wags say the head honcho of the province’s police and the head of the administration are “marked men”, as it were, and that they will be operated from the capital. This would be a mistake, given that the Punjab expects governance to rival that of The Man of Steel’s Talented Bro and before him, that of the Chory of Guj, now Speaking for the province.

Not invited


We hear The Great Khan has not invited his extended family to his oath taking. His four sisters are said not to be attending  — two are travelling abroad while the other two are staying away. We’ve also heard that The Great Khan’s sons may not attend. The big question is: will Her Holiness attend? And if so, in what garb? One rumour has it that suitable apparel is being made for her by a high profile Lahore designer, the same gent who’s doing The Great Khan’s sherwani. BTW, The Khan refers even amongst friends to his spouse as “Bushra Bibi”.

Rumours galore


Another unsubstantiated rumour is that the Brits have agreed to cooperate with the new government in ensuring transparency with regard to Pakistani investors in their country. Read, spill the beans on The Man of Steel & Co. But we’ve heard these tall tales viz the Quaid-e-Qiwam too, and nothing came of them.