The real story
There was much speculation about the unceremonious departure of A Sad Age from the Min of Fin, and how and why it finally happened, after months of tumult at the ministry. Well, the real story appears to be that the silver-haired doyenne of the I Am Effed finally got his scalp. Readers will recall that The Great Khan had first announced that he would prefer to commit suicide than beg the Fund for a bailout, and that in the end, he was left with no choice. Tragically, he chose the option of begging the Fund rather than the alternative. A Sad Age had been following the script of his great leader, and instead of advising caution given that it was obvious the government would have no choice in the end, had gone along with the empty bravado. After a string of inconclusive meetings, rumours began to do the rounds that Fund officials found A Sad Age to be both “arrogant and ill-prepared.”
Our mole reports that in mid-April the silver-haired doyenne rang up an erstwhile premier of our poor, benighted country, with whom she was acquainted. This was none other than Shortcut. She told him clearly that there would be no deal with A Sad Age in the driving seat. We hear Shortcut, who has always had a keen sense of where the real power lies, called The Boss and gave him the unequivocal message. The Boss then told The Great Khan to get on with it. Hence, A Sad Age’s hasty departure from the Ministry.
Beyond him
A group of people, sympathetic to the aims of the Pashtun Togetherness Mandate, approached the one who Speaks for our assembled nation. One of the group was a compatriot from Swabi, hometown of the one who Speaks and was banking on the latter’s sense of honour when he appealed for the production orders of the two missing Members of the House, currently guests of the state. He argued that it was their right to appear in the forum to which they had been elected, in the same manner that The Man of Steel’s Talented Bro had been brought to the House. The one who Speaks asked for some time and promised to revert. When the same people got in touch with him after some time, he told them frankly that the task was “beyond his capacity”, and that those who were the Members’ keepers would brook no interference in the matter.