I happen to be the kind of person who gets most of her news from Facebook posts and word of mouth (gossip). I read the news here and there, and surf the Internet before bed, but I never delve deep into the roots of political crises or matters of state. I really should, because I tend to get very insecure in the company of political writers and such, but my laziness always overrides my good judgment, or I get sucked into the world of Tastemade and Tip Hero. This past month, however, there happened to be as many posts on Donald Trump and Sadiq Khan on my newsfeed as there were on creative ways to chop up a watermelon. I was intrigued.
The first thing I learned about the new Mayor of London, before I even learned his name, was that he was the son of a bus driver. After a quick Google search, I found out that he was actually quite eloquent and polished, although it would have been more gratifying to see someone like Citizen Khan up on that stage. Anyway, Khan seems like the kind of person you can’t help but love. He’s so cute! He’s married to a woman named Saadiya, and I like to imagine that both of them would respond to the nickname ‘Sadoo’ - simply adorable. In a recent interview with Christiane Amanpour, Khan spoke about his victory in London, and how it had been a victory of hope over fear. He hoped the US would follow London’s lead and do the same in November, but in my opinion, it might be little too late for that.
I'm honestly surprised people are falling for Trump's fear-mongering. Even I can see through it
***
“Howdy ho, little fellas!”
Barney jumped up from behind the tree house. “Welcome to Laura’s 8th birthday party! Hooray!” he exclaimed, clapping his hands and clicking his feet. It was the stuff of dreams. Laura’s beautiful backyard was decorated with pink and blue balloons and there was candy everywhere. Some kids were jumping on the Bouncy House and others were scattered about playing tag or eating cupcakes. I, on the other hand, was seated quietly on the twister mat that Laura’s mom has laid down facing the tree house. Barney was coming.
Once all the kids had been seated on the mat, Barney immediately singled me out. “And who may you be, little girl?” he asked, giggling and clapping. “I’m Zara,” I said enthusiastically.
“Why hello Zeh-rah, where did you come from?”
“I came from Pasadena with my cousin Sara who goes to school with Laura”, I chirped.
“Oh no! I mean, where are you really from lovely guest?”
“Oh, I’m from Pakistan,” I said, a little annoyed. I wondered if he had met everyone before, because he didn’t personally question anyone else.
“Do you know who I am?” Barney asked, always smiling.
“Yes!” the chorus replied. “And what would you do if I was a stranger?” he inquired.
“Run and tell mom”, a boy with blonde hair replied.
“Very good! And why do we run from strangers?” Barney inquired again.
“Because they smell bad!” another boy replied.
“Because they do drugs,” Sara answered.
“Because they take you away and lock you in their basement!” screamed Laura.
“Yes! You never know what a stranger wants,” warned Barney. “So it’s best to keep away…”
Donald Trump's campaign relies heavily on divisive rhetoric
Donald Trump reminds me of a maid my grandmother used to have when I was a kid. She was super old and wrinkly, had orange hair, and was always walking around in a daze, prophesising about dark days to come. No, Trump isn’t cute or adorable. He’s like the acid rain that burnt down the last big birthday party hosted by Barney and Friends. But then again, Barney and Friends couldn’t defend themselves against a gust of wind, let alone a band - nay, state - of extremist fighters. This is probably the approach Trump is going for. It was best explained in the season finale of House of Cards, but I guess it basically involves scaring people to death and then offering to save them at any cost. I’m honestly surprised people are falling for it, considering that even I can see through it, and I don’t know much about US politics at all. Honestly, if people weren’t wasting their time making stupid decisions, we might actually have had two more seasons of Celebrity Apprentice to watch - it really is a very good show.
***
After the birthday party, Barney made his way to his rundown Subaru, which was parked off to the side of the house. He had hated every single minute of the afternoon, except for the part where they kids sat on his lap one by one and gave him a hug and a kiss. He also thoroughly enjoyed Laura’s mom - a classic California beauty - and made sure to give her a hug as well when he went to receive his cheque. Now, all he wanted to do was go to his apartment and plop on the couch. He wondered if there was any pizza left over, or if he needed to score tonight, and decided to stop at a 7/11 for some snacks and drinks. He also thought about finally changing his underwear and taking a shower, but it seemed too much of a hassle. Barney was tired. He rummaged through his dashboard for a cigarette and then drove off towards the slums, only to return the next time he was needed for laughter and joy.
